Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Just got today's new quest, and boy what a surprise. This marks quite a departure from the usual quests we get, as well as FV2's long-standing taboo against animal consumption. Although some would argue that they already crossed that line with the introduction of fishing and seafood recipes. So I guess that was the first step, and fried chicken is the second.
Clearly Zynga intends to gently ease us into a new omnivory era of farming by allowing us to feed upon small-at-first, then increasingly larger creatures. As a staunch supporter of PETA (People Eating Tasty Animals), I am totally OK with this.
Indeed, I can hardly wait for the day they give us an abattoir to place on our farms. I will finally be able to put all those juicy animals in my pasture to good use!
The KFC promotional tie-in was a smart move too. I am already craving fried chicken and I haven't even finished building my chicken frying machine yet. Just feast your eyes on those crispy golden brown pieces of tender, succulent chicken.
Mmmmmm. So tantalizing, my mouth is watering. I wonder if KFC paid Zynga for their product placement with cash or free fried chicken? The latter is clearly the superior option. All I know is the people at Popeyes and El Pollo Loco must be kicking themselves right now for not beating KFC to the punch on this brilliant alliance with Zynga. Score another victory for the colonel!
Friday, April 17, 2015
Wednesday, April 1, 2015
Zynga, Inc. has received many complaints about the Turkey Troubles blog. Accordingly we have confiscated this domain under authority of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA), and our attorneys have filed the appropriate legal actions in federal court against the blog owner, Choo Dessny.
The charges now pending against Mr. Dessny include various and sundry civil and criminal violations of U.S. federal intellectual property laws, including, but not limited to, criminal copyright infringement [17 U.S.C. § 506(1)(B) and 18 U.S.C. § 2319(c)], distribution of a copyrighted work over a computer network [17 U.S.C. § 506(a)(1)(c) and 18 U.S.C. § 2319(d)], trademark infringement due to false designation, origin, or sponsorship [15 U.S.C. § 1125(a)], dilution of famous trademarks [15 U.S.C. § 1125(c)], patent infringement [35 U.S.C. § 271], trafficking in counterfeit trademarks [18 U.S.C. § 2320], et al.
For over a year now, Mr. Dessny has been utilizing modified versions of the proprietary graphics of Zynga, Inc. to falsely and maliciously suggest that:
- FarmVille citizens were ruthlessly maimed and killed in pig races staged by Walter.
- FV2's crop dryers have the capacity to violently bonk players in the head.
- Beloved FarmVille character Cornelius is a violent and devious serial killer.
- The town of FarmVille was burned to the ground in an order board dispute.
- Zynga murdered everyone's most beloved farmhand, Buck.
- Walter and Marie engaged in election fraud to win the mayoral election.
- Zynga's solution to player complaints is by punishing them further.
- Zynga's mascot is a rabid dog prone to urinating and defecating on player's farms.
These blatant acts of fraud, libel, infringement and slander against Zynga and it's beloved FarmVille 2 characters shall not be tolerated, and this is why Mr. Dessny and his blog viewers and contributors are now being brought to justice. Please be advised that if you have viewed or contributed to this blog during the past seventeen (17) months in which it has been active, you may be found culpable in the pending litigation. We have collected the IP addresses of all visitors to this blog since inception and continuing; and we are currently in the process of serving subpoenas upon each and every one of your internet service providers to learn of your identities. Once identified, all visitors and contributors to this blog shall be subpenaed to court to testify as to your involvement. You may wish to consult with legal counsel at this time to discuss your rights and responsibilities in this matter.
For additional information about this case, and to review a copy of our summons and complaint, please click here.