The Ballad of Choodolph the Red-Nosed Farmer

You know Haber and Borlaug and
Wallace and Whitney,
Carver and Carson and
Deere and Fraley,



But do you recall,
The most infamous farmer of all...

Choodolph, the red-nosed farmer,
had a very shiny nose;
Because of all the liquor he'd guzzled,
everyone said it glows.

All of the other farmers,
used to laugh and call him plastered;
They never let poor Choodolph
forget he was a drunken bastard.

 Then one foggy Christmas eve,
Santa came to say:
"Choodolph with your bottle so big,
won't you give Saint Nick a swig?"

 Then all the farmers loathed him,
as they shouted out with disdain:
"Choodolph the red-nosed farmer,
you've ruined Christmas yet again!"

Merry Christmas!

Meow!

Oops!